Just so we don't take things too seriously. . .

The Original Shaggy-Dog-Story

In the days of yore, a knight was on his way to do something terribly important, riding his horse into the ground to get to his destination as fast as possible. After being ridden too hard for too long, his horse became lame, and seeing a small town ahead he headed straight for the stables there.

"I must have a horse!" he cried "The life of the King depends upon it!"

The stablekeeper shook his head. "I have no horses," he said. "They have all been taken in the service of your King."

"You must have something - a pony, a donkey, a mule, anything at all?" the knight asked.

"Nothing..... unless.... no, I couldn't"

The knight's eyes lit up. "Tell me!"

The stablekeeper leads the knight into the stable. Inside is a dog, but no ordinary dog. This dog is a giant, almost as large as the horse the knight was riding. But it is also the filthiest, shaggiest, smelliest, mangiest dog that the knight has ever seen. Swallowing, the knight said "I'll take it. Where is the saddle?"

The stablekeeper walked over to a saddle near the dog and started gasping for breath, holding the walls to keep himself upright. "I can't do it." he told the knight.

"You must give me the dog!" cried the knight. "Why can't you?"

The stablekeeper said...

"I just couldn't send a knight out on a dog like this."

 

The Magazine Correspondent

Shortly after the Korean War, the son of then South Korean President Syngman Rhee was hired as a Life Magazine correspondent. The younger Rhee was a remarkably kind, gentle and considerate man, but he had one problem: He loved to drink and sometimes was gone on a bender for days. On one occasion, Rhee was missing for three days before someone at the magazine's office finally suggested they look for him. Other correspondents and even the police were involved in the search. Finally, about two weeks later, a policeman walked into a tavern, looked at the man slumped over the bar and cried,...

"Ah, Sweet Mr. Rhee of Life, at last I've found you."

The Bacon Tree

There are two guys who have been lost in the desert for weeks, and they're at death's door. As they stumble on, hoping for salvation in the form of an oasis or something similar, they suddenly spy, through the heat haze, a small tree off in the distance.

As they get closer, they can see that the tree is draped with rasher upon rasher of bacon. There's smoked bacon, crispy bacon, life-giving juicy nearly-raw bacon, all sorts. And the smell... oh, the glorious smell!"

"Look Pepe," says the first man. "It's a bacon tree!"

"You're right!" says Pepe, "We're saved!"

Pepe doesn't wait another second. He runs up to the tree salivating at the prospect of food. But just as he gets to within five feet of the tree, there's the sound of machine gun fire, and he is shot down in a hail of bullets.

His friend quickly drops down on the sand, and calls across to the dying Pepe.
"Pepe!! Pepe!! What on earth happened?"

And with his dying breath Pepe calls back: "Ugh, run, run!! It's not a Bacon Tree after all..."

"...its a ham bush!"